It’s nice to *meet* all of my new readers who came to peek in on our Slow School. Welcome :). But, I have to admit I was a bit befuddled by all of the attention. Are you all just homeschool-exhausted? If so, I think it is good to think of the end in mind. Finish this sentence: we are schooling our children BECAUSE (fill in the blank) SO THAT (fill in the blank).
After that little exercise, it may be good to challenge what “the end in mind” that you were thinking of was. Is the point to raise kids to have ginormous IQs, a lot of letters after their names, or the ability and desire to earn a bunch of money? SO THAT they can…pay a mortgage, take part in a consumer culture, take the grandkids to Europe, buy all the latest technological gadgets (which, of course, means buying something new every 6 months)?
Or, is the point to raise kids to let them bloom into *whatever* without any sort of direction or, dare I say, hinderance, from the adults in their lives? SO THAT they can–we think–avoid conflict…but then expect the world to revolve around their every want or need, and live life in a perpetual state of being offended when that worldview collides with, well, other people? Have you seen drivers on the road each vying for ownership, lately? Or read the snarky comments online and heard them in the real world? Or watched parents who didn’t want to dampen their child’s spirit and so did somersaults in order to cater to their child’s every whim?
But if the end in mind was something akin to “glorifying and enjoying God”, then the focus becomes more about making sure they know the gospel, praying for their salvation, and then in cultivating the character they will need to do the good work, whether it be as a lawyer or librarian or lollipop-maker. Wanting our children to grow up to be faithful, responsible adults who can support themselves and/or a family is a noble endeavor, but I’m not sure we’re seeing a culture of young adults epitomizing what that looks like right now. Even though they have college degrees. Even though they got to do any activity they wanted. The academics and the activities don’t make the adult. Overworking our kids or hands-off parenting doesn’t make the adult either. The work of Christ does.
As parents, we are to teach our children, but we are to train them up, too. What are we “training” them FOR? To be stressed out because they can’t finish a math lesson, or because they can’t read yet, or because their handwriting is atrocious? Is there nothing more important than good grades, extracurricular activities, and being up on the latest i-Whatever? I’m not saying that academics aren’t important, but I’m not sure it is *The Most Important Thing Ever*.
As important as it is to work on educational pursuits, I think it’s just as important to work on homemaking, homesteading, and home-doing-nothing. As in, letting your mind think on things. As in, actually savoring and tasting the food without gulping it down to race to the next thing. As in, holding a mug of whatever and just watching the birds. Or letting your kids just play with Legos even though it’s a “school day” (and, who defines what a “school day” is, anyway?). If Jesus is the Good Shepherd (John 10:14), if He is gently leading (please get that: GENTLY…..LEEEEEEADING….) even those of us with young (Isa 40:11), then why do we feel the need or prodding to PUSH our young ones as if their lives won’t be meaningful if they don’t complete this textbook or take trigonometry or finish a few years of Spanish…
Pushing and leading are two different things, methinks.Which gets us (finally) to the use of planners. I think planners are great to use in leading our children to learn to set goals and to reach for them. It gives a great opportunity to teach the limitations of time, to prioritize, to see if there is a good balance in their desire for work and play. It keeps them (and us) accountable. We can see if they never seem to get around to their spelling lesson or if they need to be taught how to use a dictionary or atlas or commentary.
Sometimes, I wonder what our children would say if WE kept planners. Probably something like, “Um…Mom…this all looks great…but when are you gonna play?”
My kids start planners as soon as they’re able, even if I have to write their dictation. It’s rather simple.
Me: “So…what are you planning to do today?”
Child: “I want to play Legos.”
Me: “Oh? Are you working on a project?”
Child: “I’m making a garbage truck.”
Me: “Cool. Let’s write down ‘Legos’. Is it going have the lifting Dumpster so that the cans can go in easily?”
Child: (blank)…”I don’t know how….”
Me: “Well, lucky for you, we have a book! It shows all the parts of a garbage truck! Let’s have a look at that after we finish your plans for the day…”
And suddenly we’re getting into levers and all sorts of things. I think smart people call that physics.
Some common complaints I’ve heard in my house regarding planners, which may or may not have come from my 9yo boy:
“How many things do I have to have?”
Answer: “Well, you’ve got time now before lunch time, and then again for a bit before supper…what is it you’re hoping to do? Some things take longer, and some things take shorter times. Let me help you decide what will be good for today…”
“Can I just keep them in my head?”
Answer: “Oh, I wish, honey. But you know how it goes. We make all these ideas in our heads and then we get into something and *POOF* we forget that we were supposed to take out the garbage cans today! And then we have stinky diapers for another whoooooole week before the garbage truck comes around and ewwwww we don’t want that. So, no, let’s just write it down. It’ll be great to cross them off with our pencils like Zorro sword swipes!” (proceed explaining who that is….)
“But I don’t have my planner notebook.”
Answer: “Arghhhh….it’s gone into that mire called ‘Not-In-The-Proper-Place’! So sorry, honey. In the meantime, aren’t we blessed to have a drawer full of scratch paper?”
And so on…
You don’t need a special planner, but I understand that a nice one is pleasant to have on occasion. I do like the quality of this one: the Ultimate Daily Planner for Students, but truthfully I will probably just save my money and use plain paper when they’re finished with.
Here are some examples of recent plans (for one day):
9yo
finish Lego project
bike ride to library
drama class
page of math
SMF (memory work)
11yo
page of math
study flashcards
SMF (memory work)
Bible study
read 2 pages of science book
read chapter of history
bike ride to library
sewing
write a letter
read to Ruby
13yo
take notes for report
write a letter
drama class
read for 30 minutes
Bible study
one math lesson
15yo
one lesson of math
start rough draft of report
practice music
replace the septic cap
go to library
17yo
SMF (memory work)
rough draft of report
music lesson
clean the bathroom
laundry
tidy desk area
go to library
For my teens, we fill out their high school transcripts according to what their goals are, and then just “do the next thing” as they finish a class towards that end. That’s why I don’t necessarily schedule it all. We just plug along, and get it done when it’s done, whatever their age. For example, they may finish their history study, but only be halfway through algebra. It’s all right; that’s one of the beauties of homeschooling. I let them go fishing between algorithms 🙂
I hope that was helpful to you. May your days be full of learning and loving and following the leading of our perfect Good Shepherd…who I can’t imagine ever telling a child to hurry and grow up already.
Blessings,
Wow! As a disorganized teen I have been trying to get my school stuff for the summer in the right order. I am very busy and I had no idea how I was going to organize it…until I read this blog post! Thank you for giving me a glimmer of hope that I am not the only struggling with this sort of thing and that there is a way to over come it.
Right now, I have been living each day as it comes, when I think of the next day to come it is only out of necessity. I have been overloading myself with unaccomplished goals, it is so nice to step back and look at it from a different angle!
As a quick suggestion, a future blog post on setting goals (if you don’t already have one) would be very encouraging, I think, to a lot of people!
Blessings in Christ,
Issabella
Thank you for this reminder of what is important and of having the kids do a planner for their day!!!
Do you realize how radical this is? Slow schooling? I have to really think about this! It goes against my type A nature but I think this IS probably what HSing is about!